5 tips keep your flame alive when saddled down with kids

Sex is not a subject that many of us are open to discuss.As a result most couples are left out feeling ashamed of having sexual tensions at home.

In Sri Lanka sex is treated as a taboo it is not even discussed openly with the partner you chose to spend life with. One of the common reasons that your life becomes less active sexually after marriage, is not because of marriage but because you make room for children to come into the picture.

Now children are a blessing and all that, and if you were a married having children in your mind it is probably a life goal. The problem is as adorable as they are, they can also be quite a handful.

After spending a day of running after your kids, feeding them, taking them for tuition classes cooking meals, feeding them, washing them and doing laundry it seems impossible to think of sex.

Waiting for kids to grow up to get some time with your spouse might end up in divorce. Sex should not be treated as an afterthought. It is an intimate thing that is shared by you and your spouse. Many marriages seem to have problems as they do not have time to connect when kids come.

Here are a few steps to rekindle that dying flame

1. Make some couple time

You and your spouse deserve a break, sometime to spend alone with each other. Agreeing with me is not enough, make sure you include some time in your calendar for the two of you. The two of you apart would not help your kids

2. Show your love

None of us tire from hearing how much you love him and he loves you. So say it. Make sure you let her know that she is beautiful and let him know how handsome he looks. Working to keep a family going can make you feel less than sexy

3. Tease

You have limited time in bed it is always more practical to make the best use of your kid-free time. Now teasing does not need to happen in bed, a little text or two to your spouse or a sexy email can kindle that flame you thought you lost.

4. Be creative

Spontaneity may not be the strongest suit when you have kids. You don’t want to answer awkward questions. Be creative;don’t wait till the coast is clear. It could be more romantic when there is a risk, choose your times and places effectively.

5. Being tired isn’t a reason enough.

You are going to be tired, there is no avoiding that. You must try to remember that like you, your spouse too has had a tiring day. If he/ she still reach out for you, it means that he/ she badly needs to feel close to you.

So instead of giving your spouse the cold shoulder, embrace the moment, rekindle the flame and keep it alive.